Okay, I'll start. (tell 3 things about yourself - two true and one lie; we have to guess which one is the lie)
Maureen's Three:
I've jumped off a bridge.
I've been convicted of a misdemeanor.
I've received the last rites.
Fun, huh?
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11 comments:
I'm certain that you've been convicted of a misdemeanor. If I had to guess, I would say it was for SPEEDING (6-10 MPH) in the CITY OF NEW HAMPTON on 05/22/1998.
As your full name is Maureen Clare Tubbs, I'd say you were Catholic and have received last rites.
My two secrets and a lie:
I have one kidney.
I repeated (not flunked!) first grade.
I got lost hiking and spent the night under a tree.
I'll reveal the truth after everyone else posts their 3 things.
P.S. So happy to know my tax dollars are hard at work.
I believe you have one kidney, that would explain some things.
The first grade could also explain some things.
The wilderness... I dont think so.
Two secrets and a lie:
I have an offshore bank account.
I sold a piece of my art for $5,000.
I have walked through 7 miles of sewage pipe.
Here are my findings, as I have deduced them...
Maureen:
I believe #1 is the "I've jumped off a bridge" ploy. I'm sure you did this to get back at your mother for constantly asking you "If your friends jumped off a bridge, would you do it too?!?!?!"
Secret #2 is your dark secret of a misdemeanor. My guess is that it's a reckless driving charge, or perhaps contributing to the delinquency of a minor on a rural Iowa gravel road.
Last rights? Really? LIAR!!!
Mr. Butler:
Your denial of not flunking first grade makes me believe that you DID flunk first grade. How did I deduce THIS you may ask... it was ELEMENTARY!
I believe that you DO only have one kidney. Given the frame of your body, I have come to the conclusion that your body is eating itself from the inside out... its first course was one of your kidneys.
Lost hiking? Really?!? Hey, I saw that episode of Andy Griffith too... LIAR!!!
Jason:
I believe that you have an offshore bank account. I'm sure records would indicate that it was started the moment you started at Wells Fargo. Be careful, my friend. Wells Fargo has mob ties!
I believe that you sold a piece of your artwork for $5,000. I've seen a few of your illustrations and they were quite good. My guess is to get that amount, you told the buyer you were DEAD!
7 miles of sewage pipe? Really?!?!? Hey, guess what... I saw "Shawshank" too...LIAR!!!
So Maureen said I definitely had to do this. I understand I am but a stand-in in your troupe, but in honor of my last weekend of shows with you guys, I will add my comment. Therefore...two truths and a lie.
1. I sat in a puddle of hobo pee in Paris.
2. I used to be a competitive solo figure skater.
3. I dislocated my knee getting into a pickup truck.
Jason: off-shore bank account? Just sketchy enough to be true. Art? People definitely have $5000 to spend on it, so yeah. SEVEN miles of sewage pipe? I bet you are being super tricky and it's really like SIX miles or something like that. I could see that.
I hope no one's mad that I added!
Here's Tim's three:
I've had lunch at the U.S. Embassy.
I was stranded on a ride at Six Flags.
I shook hands with President Bill Clinton.
As for young Emily:
I believe the Hobo Pee story. But that's not that big of a deal for you, what with your SNL street sleepin' history.
Competitive Figure Skater... YES! In fact, I know that you are somehow involved in the Tonya Harding incident!
Dislocated?!?! Really?!?!? Badly bruised, maybe... LIAR!!!
Be ready on Wednesday to vote officially on each person's lie. Prize will go to the person with most correct. (You think I am joking, but please, I will spreadsheet the whole thing just you wait....) SO DON'T REVEAL YOUR ANSWERS TO US UNTIL WEDNESDAY! Until then, keep 'em coming... Ruoho? Zach? Cristi? Mookie?
Emily: how did you know it was hobo pee? Did you watch him pee and then decide to sit in it?
Jason: You must have sold that art work to a grandparent and then stashed the money offshore.
Tim: Which US Embassy? There are hundreds of them. Be specific!! Probably some litle Consul's tent set up at the fair. I think you shook Clinton's hand after he rescued you from the Six Flags ride.
Good thing this team is approaching the end. These lies will tear us apart.
My two secrets and a lie:
I have been handcuffed both in a good situation and bad. I ate a cricket on a dare. I once played poker for 17 hours straight.
Did you guys vote on Wednesday? I'm way late to the party, but still want to pin the tail on that donkey...
Let's see,
1. I have a son in Wisconsin
2. I went camping on the Great Wall of China
3. I shoot pool left-handed
Better late than never!
Better late than never!
1) As a child, I tried to scrape off all my tastebuds resulting in a swollen & bloody tongue.
2) In college I worked as an administrative assistance in the admissions office once saw someone on the staff flipping a coin to to decide whether a student was accepted.
3) I participated in the Milk Challenge (1 gallon of milk in 1 hour) and puked my guts out in the middle of the cafeteria at school when I lost.
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